My Daughter's Mother's Day Gift To Me

On Mother's Day, some women make lists of the jewelery or appliances they want, and brunch, lunch, or dinner are bestowed upon us as acknowledgement for the time, energy, and stress that we put into being in charge of the little lives we've brought into this world. These tokens of love are wonderful gestures, but for me, the gifts that I never forget are the spontaneous ones that come directly from the heart with no retail middleman. That's why, when I woke up this morning and found this note pinned to my door, I was surprised, impressed, and touched in a place that a bouquet of flowers could never reach:


Dear,  My beautiful mother,

Because of my signature comma after the Dear, you can tell right away who this is.

Happy Mother's Day!! I'm sorry I can't buy you any gifts because, well let's face it, I'm only thirteen. Anyway, today is your day and you deserve it. 

You're the best mom I could ask for. I know I yell at you and have nasty attitudes some of the time, but in the end, I love you. You take great care of me and buy me all of my clothes and food, and I'm soooo grateful. 

Whenever you and I are together, we always laugh...well most of the time. You're a crazy, funny, gorgeous, weird, and loud mama, and I'm proud to be called your daughter.

You always support me in everything I do, like soccer, basketball, volleyball, lacrosse, and dance.

Yo solo queria decir que te amo. Que estas haciendo un gran trabajo con nosotros, los ninos. He aprendido un poco mas espanol solo parce ti. Una madre de sus hijas es mejor amigo de verdad. Te quiero a la luna y de regreso.

Happy Mother's Day!

Love, 
Your favorite child,     

Bellie


Bella is my youngest child. She is the most practical of all my kids, and is great at looking at the big picture. In just three short years, the other two will be away at college and we'll be alone before she graduates. This note is just the beginning. She knows the value of being the only child, especially when her siblings will be very missed, but far away.

Well played my friend.

CF Winn is the award-winning author of The COFFEE BREAK SERIES, a quirky group of short stories meant to be read while on break or in the waiting room of the doctor’s office. Her first novella, SUKI, has been grabbing hearts and hugging souls all over the United States. 

You can now order SUKI in paperback at BOOK REVUE, one of the nation’s largest independent bookstores, by email at info@bookrevue.com Learn more about SUKI at BOOK REVUE. 

More posts like these can be found at Humor Outcasts and The Patch where she is a regular contributor. 

CF Winn is the founder of Winning! Publications, a firm specializing in editing and promotion services for authors. Her latest project is the just released Trailer Trash, With a Girl’s Name, a hilarious and heartwarming story of a boy saddled with a girl’s name and forced into a nomadic existence. Order it now: http://www.amazon.com/Trailer-Trash-With-Girls-Name-ebook/dp/B00IX0MIAO 

KIDS TODAY

One day, a few years ago, I picked up my daughter from school. She immediately handed me a note. She hung her head and said, "The teacher told me to give you this."

It said:
DEAR, (long space) MRS. WINN
ISABELLA WAS RUNNING IN THE HALLS TODAY. WE (who is "we"??) WANTED TO WRITE AND TELL YOU THAT SHE IS A BAD GURL.
LOVE,
MRS. SLOMAN

It was written in my 7 year old daughter's handwriting......


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I was playing colors/shapes BINGO en espanol with my Preschool and Kindergarten students, when I noticed one of the kids slip something into his mouth and begin chewing. I immediately flew over to his seat and stopped the game when I asked him what was in his mouth. He shook his head while saying nothing. Again I asked and he silently shook his head, a little more forcefully this time. Worried that he was going to choke on a small button or something, I got a paper towel and told him to spit it into the paper. He did so without resistance, and when I looked for the object of the controversy, I saw a green boogie....


CF Winn is the award-winning author of The COFFEE BREAK SERIES, a hilarious group of short stories meant to be read while on break or in the waiting room of the doctor's office. Her first novella, SUKI, has been grabbing hearts and hugging souls all over the United States.

You can now order SUKI in paperback at BOOK REVUE, one of the nation’s largest independent bookstores, by email at info@bookrevue.com or by calling (631) 271-1442.
Learn more about SUKI at BOOK REVUE http://www.bookrevue.com/localauthors.html

Hoy Es Chocolate Chip

Once a week for one hour, I used to teach preschoolers basic Spanish. I did  it for five years and the teachers at the school were appreciative. From 1pm-2pm on Thursdays, they got a well deserved break, and the kids in their classes were offered the opportunity to learn how to annoy adults in another language.

I had twenty-five students from many different backgrounds. Some were African American or West Indian, some were mature for their age, some were gifted and some, not so much. But I loved teaching these kids. Every week, somebody learned something, and every week, there was a new story to tell.

For example, one day, my ADD girl, Erin, decided to unbutton her shirt while I was teaching. We weren't doing clothing like last year when Michael, a twin, drew genitals on the androgynous body form we were supposed to be dressing.(His sister, Laura, had the same idea and drew breasts on her paper...damn twin telepathy)

This time, we were going over the alphabet. When she did it, Erin went up to her regular teacher and complained that she didn't know how to button back up. Her teacher said, "Oh no. You got yourself into this mess, now you can get yourself out." Erin is one of my gifted students, but without something to keep her occupied, we lose her. Little did we all know what not getting her clothes straightened out would lead to.

She stomped away from her teacher, frustrated that she wasn't going to get any help,but she plopped down silently in the middle of the kids on the rug. I continued the lesson. I turned my back and pointed to the letter "H". Erin screamed at the top of her lungs, "HACHE!". I spun around quickly and saw her raise both of her hands in triumph but almost choke on her shirt, which was now around her neck like a scarf. Both arms were out of the sleeves and she wasn't wearing an undershirt. I made eye contact with her teacher as Erin was airlifted out of the group and her look clearly said, "You're welcome."

Score one for education in America. No one gets left behind.

Little Michael only spoke Polish. I managed to break through slightly and teach him the phrase, "Me llamo". He also had ADD. The same day, after the Erin incident, I had him sit with me as I struggled to continue teaching. Every once in a while, just so I wouldn't lose him, I would ask him questions. I'd say,"Michael, cual es la fecha de hoy?" He was very enthusiastic as he yelled, "ME LLAMO MICHAEL!" in my ear. (I have to admit,that was a far better answer than the kid who responded "Chocolate Chip", when I asked the same question.)

Most of the time he fidgeted. I put him on my lap so I could control his movements a little better. He faced the class, but his back was to me. Eventually, he started trying to kick a little boy in the face that was sitting in front of us. And someone in the back of the room informed me that Michael was picking his nose every time I wasn't holding his hands to keep him from grabbing the decorations off of the wall.

With fifty minutes still left, and the teachers off to the side eating a snack and gossiping, Nicholas sat in between ten kids coughing up a lung. No one ever moved him out of the crowd.

By the time I got home, I felt like I needed a bath. What's the Spanish for Valium?


 CF Winn is the award-winning author of The COFFEE BREAK SERIES, a hilarious group of short stories meant to be read while on break or in the waiting room of the doctor's office. Her first novella, SUKI, has been grabbing hearts and hugging souls all over the United States.

You can now order SUKI in paperback at BOOK REVUE, one of the nation’s largest independent bookstores, by email at info@bookrevue.com or by calling (631) 271-1442.
Learn more about SUKI at BOOK REVUE http://www.bookrevue.com/localauthors.html