Sunday, October 12, 2014

Which Way Do I Go?

I am convinced that elves are not only real, but also very busy and not at all working on my behalf. For example, today, they instigated a nasty three-way between my router, cable modem, and internet provider, and by the looks of things no one was going to get a happy ending.

After fiddling with the wires and poking around a bit, I still couldn't get anyone turned on enough to perform, so I left to buy a new router - I figured that like in all three-ways, at some point, someone is bound to be the odd man out, possibly because the right chemistry is just not there.

On the way to the store, I heard a few angry honks and realized that one of my rear blinker bulbs had blown. For the fifth time. And in a few hours I'd be driving to and from Pennsylvania in the dark during a severe thunderstorm.

I'd like to say that I shrugged it off because that's really just a typical morning for me, but after a failed router, a trip to the cable store, and two rounds at the car dealership (the blinker bulb had not just burned out but had also gotten so hot that it melted to the socket) I have to admit that by 8am, I was more than a little bit frazzled.

In just a few short hours my frustration climaxed, leaving me unfulfilled and pondering my next move. I thought, if only my life came with some directions. At that moment, I was like the blinker on my car, only able to turn one way - toward giving up. Although sometimes it's great being on your own - you don't have to worry about pleasing someone else, you can go at life as hard and as fast as you like - a partner can offer something more and either shake things up a bit, or guide you softly to a better feeling.

Without directions we'd be lost, but sometimes they're not clear, or something pushes us to ignore them and create a new path for ourselves. In my case, realizing that disasters had become my norm has sparked desire that I had forgotten about. I'd like to try a new position in which I balance my years of experience with the free spirit I thought I'd outgrown. That's a three-way I'd jump on like a horny teen in a library full of porn.

In the end, will I pull it out? Or will I need some assistance with getting it up and having it last? I'll let you know. In the meantime, does anyone have a cigarette?

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CF Winn is the award-winning author of The COFFEE BREAK SERIES, a quirky group of short stories meant to be read while on break or in the waiting room of the doctor’s office. Her first novella, SUKI, has been grabbing hearts and hugging souls all over the United States. 

You can now order SUKI in paperback at  or at BOOK REVUE, one of the nation’s largest independent bookstores, by email at Learn more about SUKI at BOOK REVUE. 

CF Winn is the founder of Winning! Publications, a firm specializing in editing and promotion services for authors. Her latest project is the just released Trailer Trash, With a Girl’s Name, a hilarious and heartwarming story of a boy saddled with a girl’s name and forced into a nomadic existence. Order it now: 


Greg Mischio said...

Wow erotic cable hardware. Not sure that's ever be done before. : )

CF Winn said...

New genre?